To Have and to Hold: Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma

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She joined the ABC News team to write their first enhanced digital book— about the history of Royal marriages, then joined ABC News as a live correspondent covering Prince William’s wedding to Kate Middleton. at the end when Joe is thrown out he is in denial and he is sorry that he got caught he was expecting Alice to forgive him after all he is a red blooded male and she has forgiven him in the past(i skipped in between but one dialogue gave me this impression when he is thrown out) I enjoyed how conversational Millwood's book feels, like you're not being lectured at but actually seen, that your feelings are valid and your fears are taken seriously. Millwood covers a range of important topics, such as the loss of self, the isolating state of modern American motherhood, the very real stress that children bring to a marriage, and how to move forward with your new life. Millwood works to correct her "dismay at how many books there are about pregnancy and childbirth and how few books there are about the complete metamorphosis we undergo once we become parents." (86) Watching Alice just be in denial about her husband nightly activities with other women was frustratingly painful. I felt bad for her, but I was also furious with her. Even if she didn’t know her husband was cheating, she wasn’t happy at all. I would’ve left a long time ago. But the signs were there and she ignored them. I wanted her to find out sooner than she did. I wanted pain, suffering and retribution from Joe. I wanted the second half of the book to be more about her and Harry. I feel like Harry’s apparent feelings for her were a bit out of the blue, but you can kind of see how that happens.

Most writers love what they do and I’m no exception. I love it when I get a germ of an idea and get it down on paper. I love breathing life into my characters. I love writing about women who persevere and prevail because that’s what I had to do to get to this point in time. It’s another way of saying it doesn’t matter where you’ve been, what matters is where you’re going and how you get there. The day I finally prevailed was the day I was inducted into the New Jersey Literary Hall of Fame. For me it was an awesome day and there are no words to describe it. Ini merupakan buku pertama Jane Green yg kubaca.Buku ini dibeli saat mengikuti diklat di Yogyakarta, Des 2011 dengan harga obral,tujuannya untuk hiburan dimalam hari berhubung kamar di Wisma Balai Diklat Yogyakarta tidak disediakan TV. TV hanya ada diruang makan dan lobby.(Disuruh belajar boo..hehe). Tapi ternyata sampai diklat selama seminggu berakhir,buku ini ngga sempat dibaca karena kami lebih banyak menghabiskan waktu untuk berburu batik dan kuliner di sekitar Jogja sehabis mengikuti kelas..:) Jadilah buku ini baru dibaca akhir Maret, menemani cuti seminggu selama di Jakarta,tapi baru tuntas setelah di Pontianak lagi..ini sdh blm ya reviunya.. As she explains, women have an innate, attuned sensitivity to their babies because of their prenatal relationship and hormonal changes. Dads, on the other hand, have to actively work to develop a bond with their babies, and become attuned through practice and repetition. However, she isn't willing to accept this as a signal that maybe it is really okay if Mom is the one who does most of the childcare, while Dad is the primary provider and is involved secondarily in child-rearing. This arrangement doesn't work for everyone, and isn't possible when the family's survival depends on two incomes, but she is amazingly resistant to accepting that it's okay for some people to take their cues from biology. She is completely unwilling to give up on the idea that parents should have equal investments in childcare, and even though she provides great advice about how dads can get more involved and develop deep bonds with their babies, her preconceived notions distort this part of the book. Alice è sposata da cinque anni con Joe, un uomo affascinante e seducente, con un lavoro di alto livello. Ma Alice per compiacere il marito ha nascosto il suo vero io, le sue aspirazioni ed è diventata una specie di bambolina da esibire alle feste e ai vari party. Ma questo non è tutto....perché il caro maritino è un traditore seriale, il tipo da una scappatella dietro l'altra e quindi da riunioni fino a tarda sera, cene di lavoro, viaggi di lavoro. Ed ovviamente la povera moglie, di cui, però, è molto innamorato, non sa nulla. Mentre leggevo volevo urlare "Alice svegliatiiiii!!!": è vero che la moglie è l'ultima a sapere le cose ma qualche dubbio ogni tanto no???!?!?!. The main character in Spellbound is Alice who you instantly warm to in Green's clever way of introducing you to her characters. Alice is married to Joe who I instantly disliked he moulds Alice into his ideal trophy wife encouraging her to dye her hair blonde and lose weight and wear designer clothes. They lead a very executive life, invited to every high profile dinner, dance or party.A clinical psychologist’s exploration of the modern dilemmas women face in the wake of new motherhood When Molly Millwood became a mother, she was fully prepared for what she would gain: an adorable baby boy; hard-won mothering skills; and a messy, chaotic, beautiful life. But what she did not expect was what she would lose: aspects of her identity, a baseline level of happiness, a general sense of wellbeing. And though she had the benefit of a supportive husband during this transition, she also at times resented the fact that the disruption to his life seemed to pale in comparison to hers. Powerful and important. Should be required reading for couples before their first kid is born, since a huge share of the challenges that arise with the transition to parenthood stem from misaligned expectations. Yeah sure, the logistics and the sleep and the finances are hard, but they are concrete problems that are solvable. It's the nebulous feelings that are corrosive. Preparation -- even just knowing to anticipate that your marriage and your self-identity will get rattled -- makes a huge difference in making it through relatively unscathed. A former journalist in the UK, she has had her own radio show on BBC Radio London, and is a regular contributor on radio and TV, including as well as regularly appearing on television shows including Good Morning America, The Martha Stewart show, and The Today Show.

On the importance of paternity leave: "It might cost the family more money if Dad takes parental leave, but that might be income extremely well 'spent' if it is viewed as a kind of insurance policy against developing gendered power imbalances in the relationship, and the marital dissatisfaction that comes with them." (99)Also, her ideas of equality in marriage send the message that traditional arrangements are always harmful. She laments that 50/50 childcare is more of a dream than the norm, since women tend to take on the brunt of domestic duties even when they are working equal hours to their husbands, but even when she is writing about stay-at-home moms, she conveys a sense of judgment about how much more involved women are, and how much more parenthood affects them than their spouses. She views marriages as patriarchal and unequal when there isn't an even labor split, and that is absolutely unreasonable, especially considering the biological elements that she kept contradicting herself on. On changing relationship dynamics: "Generally, a new mother is primarily concerned with getting adequate support in caring for the new baby, and a new father is primarily concerned--though perhaps less consciously--with the fear that he has been usurped by the baby. Indeed, the feeling new fathers often have in relation to their wives is one of being irrelevant, or at least less relevant than they used to be, and this is typically a very painful feeling to bear." (169) Reprinted in 1931 with personal notes about the author and illustrator Frank E. Schoonover at 331p. Dengan gaji dan tunjangan yang baru, Joe bisa membeli 1 apartemen di Manhattan dan rumah di daerah pedesaan.

Cinco años después, Alice y Joe siguen felizmente casados... Bueno, más o menos, porque Joe siempre está trabajando y casi no se ven, a Alice esa vida glamurosa que llevan no le acaba de gustar y encima ahora, a causa del trabajo de Joe, se tienen que ir a vivir a Nueva York. Pero una vez en Estados Unidos Alice cumplirá por fin su verdadero sueño: vivir en una encantadora casita en el campo, una casa que perteneció a una escritora que tenía muchas cosas en común con Alice y que hará ver a esta que su matrimonio es de todo menos de color de rosa. This book was defiantly upto the high standard of Jane Green's better books. I found the first chapter a bit of a struggle but once past this the story flowed nicely. I didn't feel that there were any predictable parts to this book, there were constant twists happening. Jane describes the two main characters well letting you warm to Alice and wanting her to finally be herself and be happy and also describing Joe making you feel slightly cold towards him like you usually do with womanisers.Printed in the Riverside Literature Series (1934) with introduction notes and suggestions by Grace Shoup. Together with writing books and blogs, she contributes to various publications, both online and print, including anthologies and novellas, and features for The Huffington Post, The Sunday Times, Cosmopolitan and Self. She has taught at writers conferences, and does regular keynote speaking, and has a weekly column in The Lady magazine, England’s longest running weekly magazine. There were some very moving and beautiful portions at the close of the book about how motherhood not only destabilizes marriages and a sense of self but also expands the same in ways that are probably only apparent with some distance. I found this very touching. The author is at her best when showing vulnerability.

With her soldier husband MIA, a dedicated wife and mother learns to adjust in this novel by the bestselling author of Seasons of Her Life .

Alice seperti menemukan hidupnya kembali. Dia mulai membenahi rumah di pedesaan yang dulunya dimiliki oleh Rachel Danbury, seorang penulis. Kehidupan rumahtangganya mulai berantakan karena Alice lebih sering berada di rumah desanya sementara Joe menetap di Manhattan. The complex truths of motherhood will continue to make everyone uncomfortable and ashamed until they're articulated readily and repeatedly. (220) Bisa ditebak lagi, Alice cuma menjadi "istri piala". Joe menuntut Alice untuk selalu tampil prima, sehingga Alice harus melakukan diet ketat, meluruskan rambut, menghighlight rambut sehingga menjadi warna honey blond, memakai sepatu berhak tinggi Jimmy Choo dan tindakan yang menyiksa lainnya. In a flourish of action, Percy, with the help of Pocahontas‘s brother Nantauquas and his pet panther, escapes the clutches of Lord Carnal. Percy then meets Opechancanough, who promises fidelity but secretly plans violence. Even Nantauquas turns on the Englishmen, telling Percy, “This is the red man’s land … When you first came we thought you were gods; but you have not done like the great white God who, you say, loves you so. You are wiser and stronger than we, but your strength and wisdom help us not: they press us down from men to children; they are weights upon the head and shoulders of a babe to keep him under stature.” De Jane Green solo había leído un libro anteriormente, hace ya bastantes años, pero aun así sabía exactamente lo que esperar de ella: una historia ligera, que enganche, con unos personajes lo suficientemente interesantes como para querer meterte sus vidas y especialmente una lectura con la que no haya que pensar mucho, que a veces es lo que apetece. Y sí, exactamente eso me encontré al leer Hechizada.